~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The Kids~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Following the leader

Todd and I have been married over 17 years now. 17 years!  Wow. I don't feel that old.

 There were a lot of things I didn't know when we got married. Let's just say I was no Betty Crocker, nor was I Susie Homemaker. One thing that I had managed pretty well was finances. I could keep a checkbook balanced and have always been good with numbers. When we got married we both naturally assumed I would take care of the bills. It wasn't something Todd really enjoyed doing and I was only working p/t anyway.....why not?

So I have done the bills for the last 17 years. I have set up budgets and followed them to the penny. I have set up budgets and not followed them at all. I have read Dave Ramsey's books and listened to his radio show. We have great credit and our lights have never been shut off, so I think I've done a decent job, but something has been tugging at my heart lately. Thankfully Todd has always been blessed with a great job that supported us well. We have never really had to skimp and save, but there have been times where a decision needed made. Sometimes I would ask Todd and other times I wouldn't bother him with it. That's just how it's always been.

Todd and I enjoy discussing things together. Priorities. Goals. What do we wish for our children? That sort of thing. I am so thankful for a husband that enjoys talking with me! So many times over the years Todd has relied on my interpretation of our financial situation to make a decision. Now there's nothing at all wrong with that. He knows that I am perfectly capable of adding 2+2. It's about more than the numbers and the math though.

He and I look at things so differently. We really do compliment each other in that way. He is a big picture type of guy. I am a details type of gal. I don't know why I never thought of it before, but how can he be expected to lead our family when he doesn't have the whole picture?  

I had been thinking about this for months and was ready to ask Todd if he would take over the bills. I had this beautiful scene in my mind.....I would explain to him all that I have been feeling and he would completely understand, agree with me and we would skip off into the sunset......Wrong!

I'm a big dope and I flew off the handle about some small detail and said, "Fine! You do it.". Not one of my finer moments.  A while later I was able to articulate all that I had been thinking these past several months and he saw my reasoning. Todd officially took over this week. I have to admit that I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.Not from the work of doing a task, but from all the thoughts and worry that I had over them.

Just yesterday he took something that I was unable to make a decision about and simply said, "This is how it is." and it was done. That's it. Finished.

Sweet relief!  It is so much easier following the leader.

Have a blessed day! ~Tammy


Beth said...

So happy for you Tammy! May God bless this new arrangement since it was done for such pure reasons. Praying for you both. You put it so well, "How can he be expected to lead with out having the big picture?"

Tammy said...

Thanks Beth! Is this THE Beth? Just making sure. :)